Saturday, December 15, 2012

A Looser Who Won

I am backing out.
What ?? There is no going back. A yes is a yes.  I have already paid 2000 Rs to Zafar. Gaurav is also contributing 1000 Rs.
Ok, fine. I will pay the rest. I know, My promotion treat has been long due. Raj was poked enough number of times for his treat, so as to concede defeat.
This treat would be one of its kind, a treat no one else would have given to anyone.
May be (pause). I have not been to many treats, So how would I know ??
Yes, let’s make this diwali night memorable for all of us. A night, I am sure, we all will never be able to forget in your lifetime.

As his moped left a trail of thick black smoke, Raj kept staring at the circles formed by it, wondering if it were a noose, tightening around his neck. He used to be a good boy, in fact in his college days, he was so dumb, a special award was constituted to honour people like him. And, today he is going to get a bravery award for something, he would never imagined even in the wildest of his dreams. Trin.. Trin.. Trin.. Raj was woken from slumbers by the all-too-familiar Nokia ringtone.

Hey Raj. Happy Diwali, man.
Same to you man.
What are doing on Diwali ??
Nothing special.
Come over, I have few friends gathered, after bursting crackers, we plan to drink. You want to join ??
I don’t drink, man. What will I do ??
You can have some Fanta, man. Come over.
Ok, I am in.

Chetan was due to come back by 9. A glance at his wrist watch gave Raj some relief, It would be another couple of hours, before we will have our surprise. Raj is sure, he will be back in time. 

Are there any more crackers left ??
No dude, we are all done with crackers.
I am feeling hungry, man.
Let’s order some chicken. Chicken goes along very well with Red Wine.

The chicken arrived in no time. There was a KFC outlet very close. Who are these people, working even on Diwali nights, delivering happiness to their customers. Raj felt very sorry for the delivery-boy. This world can never be the same for the rich and the poor. Raj wished him Happy Diwali with a cosmetic smile on his face and offered a generous tip. Inside the room, everybody was busy pouring lemon onto their glasses of Vodka.

No fanta for me. Raj almost screamed, taking everyone by surprise.
Why ??
I want to drink.
Really ?? Dude, this is not Red Wine. This is Vodka, the real wine.
I want to give it a try.

The first sip induced a burning sensation near his threat, but Raj somehow managed to swallow it.

Not Bad, Raj. I had vomited my first sip, you did a lot better.
Second sip onwards, Raj started enjoying the taste of Vodka.
Another glass for me.
Are you sure ??
Yes, I am.

No body knew, what occurred to Raj on that fateful Diwali night, but he kept on drinking, as if there was no tomorrow. There was something heavenly about Vodka. Raj can only vaguely recollect a Russian story from his school days, when a farmer was made aware of beauties of Vodka by an imp. Though, it was just a story and the imp just an imp, Raj somehow felt imp's presence in that room, as if he was talking to him. Remember...After first glass, you all will become fox ...

Hey, Raj. Don’t you want to go home. We are done with drinks. Raj's body was being vigourously shaken, but Vokda magic was not going away soon.
I don’t think, he will wake up. Let’s not waste time.
We had a great time today, hadn't we ??
Ya, man. Raj turned out to be a dark horse. 
What is the time ??
It is already well past midnight.
No wonder, I am feeling sleepy.

All of them were now lying one after the other, just like pigs in a pool of mud (After 3 glasses, you will become a pig). Suddenly, the infamous Nokia ring-tone made its present felt.

Shit, man. What an irritating ring-tine ??
Must be Raj.

Raj was not known for his taste of music, but this ring tone was too bad, even by his standards.

Hey, Venkat.
Is Raj still there ??
Yes, he is (pause) but sleeping.
Really ?? Tell him his surprise is here. What is he doing there ?? Would not he want a taste of his surprise ??
No man, he is drunk and fast asleep.

Even though Venkat's voice was loud and clean, Chetan tried adjusting the volume of his handset and requested Venkat to repeat his words

Drunk and Fast asleep.
Almost in disbelief, When did he start drinking ??
Only today.
Poor chap. The surprise would be here only for a night. He missed out on some real fun.

Next morning, when Raj reached his flat, he was informed of the surprise and the opportunity missed. It is better to be a clean pig than a corrupt human. Raj won’t get the bravery award, as planned earlier. But he is not sad. He has not won many awards in his life, but this was one award, he was happy loosing. 

As Raj readied himself for an important meeting in office, Chetan’s voice was still echoing in the room, You looser, You looser ...

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